My Adult Account

I was always afraid of dating men, because I simply felt more attracted to woman. My first love was that of a woman named Candice. She had blonde hair and we were only sixteen years of age. She was full of spunk and dressed very sexy. I knew that there was something different about her when we sang together in our chorus class at school.

She always stated that her first love was our Algebra teacher Mr. Bristow. She would daydream off into space and never hold a very long attention span at all during class. But, one day he confronted Candice and told her that it was a childish fantasy that she needed to drop and focus more on her education. Candace became very bitter. She would often criticize the boys in our class that were not as sexy as some of the others, and was just very hateful to be around.

One day, I found her crying in the bathroom and I began to hold her until she stopped crying. She stated that she felt as if she were crazy for a secret that she had been keeping inside for a very long time. She told me that she thought girls were sexy. I told her that there was nothing wrong with her at all, although I felt that there was indeed something wrong! I had felt the same secret for the longest time, and it all pertained to her! I could not and would not ever tell her this though.

We began to become very close friends and spend the night at each other's houses and have shopping parties together. After about a year had passed, Candace began to become very jealous if I did not hold all of my attention to just her. If she knew I was talking to anyone else besides her on the phone or after school she would become raging angry with me.

One afternoon, we got into a huge argument and she started to cry. I felt very worried about her and asked her what was wrong with her. She stated that she was in love with me and that she was afraid of losing me to someone else.

I was shocked! I told her that we could be just friends, although secretly inside I felt the same way.

Until this day, I continue to remember the times that I spent with Candace and know that forever in my heart, she would always be considered my first love.